Saturday, 25 November 2006

Technology Controls My Life

In case any of you have wondered what happened to me, below is a polite chronicling of recent past events, all surrounding wire, metal and bizarre circuitry. But I am back, and struggling mightily to find the water's surface again.

My computer had the nerve to go all ‘Six-Feet-Under’ on me. My husband informed me that not even his super-powers could revive the traitor, and I’d have to take it to a professional. Gulp. This means huge chunks of time spent without the aid of my own personal assistant, my willing slave, my computer. I won't even think of how much money this could possibly cost.

And before you ask, YES, I had back ups. But you can't do squat with a back up until you have a machine to put them on.

After I drop off my baby at the local computer hospital for surgery, I wander back to my car, empty handed. The technician couldn’t magically flip a switch and say everything was fine. It wasn't going to be like when you go to the mechanic and your car stops making that noise.

This was going to take time, something none of us seem to have. The snap of the cold wind slapping my cheeks shakes me from my near panic, but now it’s official. I am helpless. Knowing that I can't go back home and continue on my work-day has me feeling a little bit lost.

When I should be busily answering emails, planning my day, getting work done, instead I am driving home wondering what to do. Even knowing I have a laptop that I can use doesn’t comfort me. I am so having an Eeyore moment.

Eventually I decide to be bigger than the problem and drive home with a thankful attitude that the laptop is waiting for me, ready to go into battle.

Well, ready for battle after I update the antivirus subscription, run the full system scan, scan for security updates, antivirus updates and program updates. Five hours later, the laptop is ready to use. And I'm too stressed and irritated to put it to work.

My PDA has some contacts, my cell phone has others. Not one perky little device has all of the answers for me, no matter what buttons I push. Not even all the perky little devices put together can help me get the work done that I need. I want my computer back. I need the mother ship. Sigh.

It seems that somehow, the convenience of all of these nifty gadgets has got a crazy hold on me. I know I’m not the only one who has become an unwitting victim of this technology war.

The laptop had me at its mercy as I tried to get it up to date and ready to use. My cell phone only holds the contacts that I call regularly, and my PDA doesn’t include the business contacts that are currently held prisoner on my computer. It’s enough to make a girl go even crazier.

Our world has become dependent on machines to get us through our days. Whether it’s at work or at home, we are held captive by our electronic gadgets. You’ll realize it the next time you punch in two minutes to microwave dinner, scream at your child to turn off the X-Box and come to the table, yank your daughter’s keyboard out of her room for inappropriate on-line behaviour, or when your cell phone rings with a really important emergency call from a girlfriend, right in the middle of said meal.

Me? While I wait for my computer to come home, I’m going to go download a couple of cool ring tones for my cell phone, and then maybe change the wallpaper on my PDA.

I know the minute my PC comes home I'll be all over it like a wolf on fresh kill. Until then, I'll just have to keep myself busy doing regular stuff, like laundry and vacuuming. Eek.